Schmitz and Sass

The election is over. It seems a general consensus for most people, is relief. 
No more automated calls. A temporary end to annoying and confusing prop 
commercials. Reuniting with friends and family recently hidden, unsubscribed  to 
or temporarily deleted by the polarized frenzy that dominated our social 
networks. People are back to talking about the weather, posting messages of 
thanks for the holiday and their life events. It seems like much of the world is 
back in pre-election order. 

Comparing my experience of the 2008 election with the most recent, I can't help 
but notice a very significant social shift. Although only four years ago, there 
has been a dramatic change in one area in particular I'd like to highlight, 
although there were many issues this season to discuss, and often were discussed 
quite emotionally. The inequality issue. You know that big GAY issue. Now, 
wherever you stand on the issue is really not the point I would like to draw 
attention to, it's the social reaction to this issue I'm fixated on. 

I was extremely interested in the 2008 election, thrilled by the opportunity of 
having the first black president in my lifetime, in addition, having such a 
strong candidate represent my party. I followed Nate Silver before he became a 
household name, and a pundits worst nightmare. I watched in amazement as history 
was made and changed. A true revolution had begun. 

In my experience, four years ago, gay marriage was a hot topic. It has been, for 
quite a while. Although many people, gay and straight were demanding these 
rights, it was put on the back burner. After all, we had just finished with an 8 
year reign, that left the country in an upheaval. Our economy was failing, our 
image as a country was failing, our caring for one another was failing. We were 
a big fat American failure. Instead of continuing a giant pity party, the 
country banded together (the majority anyway) and saw hope over despair. 

Homosexuality as a social issue, although no stranger to conflict and strife, by 
2008 seemed to be integrated as somewhat socially acceptable, despite it's 
longterm taboo in western culture. Finally it seemed as if the 'taboo' was 
beginning to be seen for what it was. No big fucking deal. There was a tolerant 
air about it. Almost as if it was being quietly, and politely accepted. Although 
the marriage equality issue was still very important to the gay community, and 
miles away from where they wanted to be, my perception was, for them to have the 
opportunity to be outwardly accepted was a huge and overdue milestone. Almost as 
if to say, it's okay if you don't agree with me, or if you think it's wrong, or 
against your religion, or don't support my desire for fair or equal rights; we 
can still be friends, and will always be family etc. A bittersweet unspoken 
social treaty was being upheld. Repression of the people, by closeted bigots. 
After all by 2008, being outwardly hateful just wasn't very PC.  

Fast forward 2012. The year the world ends. Great profits decorations, mayans, 
buzz, buzz, buzz about the end of the world as we know it. A humming of social 
consciousness shifting and transformations taking place. New election, new 
issues. Well, not really. Same issues of every election, just a different time. 
I was just as passionate about this election, but for some reason felt more 
outspoken then ever about it. Before I was loud, but now I couldn't help but 
scream. All around me people had opinions, and they were being just as loud. 
Social networking sites like Facebook which were always a place of opinion, 
became sounding boards for peoples platforms, such as myself. Facts, lies, 
comedy, news, petitions, and some knock out drag out facebook faceoffs, usually 
ending in a gang up of likeminded facebook friends, a deletion, or at the very 
least an agree to disagree and a visit to said 'friends' page to unsubscribe. 
People were worked up and they wanted to not just talk about it, but make some 
serious ultimatums. 

The issues started to become poster topics, and with two justices up for grabs, 
the importance was tangible. The gay issue was back and bigger than ever. With 
one candidate in solidarity and one in opposition. An old war was re-ignited. 
Although this time the fallout would be much different. All of a sudden, when 
push came to shove, and a friend or family member or social networking 
acquaintance disagreed with a stance, that often represented a right of that 
person, the relationship was scarred. There was no more 'agree to disagree.' A 
line was drawn in the virtual sand. You stand with me, or you stand against me, 
and no one in my chosen circle will stand in opposition of being equal to me. 
People declared their stances, and taunted friends and family to de-friend them 
as a means to make a long overdue statement. Now everything was different. Our 
friendships and our family meant nothing without support and love. These values 
were being tested and tried. It was not good enough anymore to simply love 
someone and then, simultaneously vote against them. The hypocrisy was exposed. 

It's been in my experience to witness a majority of older people are less open 
to new ideas or change, and I've often wondered if that was in direct 
correlation to someone being considered 'old'. After all, I know people who are 
older in age and not in body, mind, and spirit. In contrast, I know people who 
are young that seem 'old'. I think it may be flexibility. As you age you become 
more or less flexible. In mind, in body and in spirit.  Or rather, more 
inclusive, or more exclusive. Due to this recent thought, I've tried to make an 
even more concentrated effort to include more, than exclude. Now, my opinions on 
things like politics, religion and other hot button topics are still prevalent, 
however, I try not to perpetuate an us verses them mentality. I've tried to come 
to the realization that as passionately as I believe in what I think is right, 
so is the person I disagree with, therefore, we are the same. This of course 
never dissuades me from actually having a nice healthy debate. Due to the 
dichotomy, it's made me reflect on this core question;

How does one create and nurture diversity without division?

How can we unite when we have such polarizing viewpoints. Contrast will always 
be present, as a means and marker of desire and growth. But how do we celebrate 
diversity, acknowledge and celebration those qualities and yet fully unite? 

I began examining relationships. People bond over shared experiences and 
preferences. When a significant difference emerges, it can be seen and felt much 
like a speed bump. Sometimes, given how serious the preference even, say that 
preference is a belief, a dent is created within the foundation of the 
relationship. Suddenly one questions the validity, truthfulness or authenticity 
of the keen ship. In this example, the very basis of the friendship can be 
compromised due to differences of opinion, especially opinions that weigh heavy 
in symbolic state. Often our religious, or non religious opinions mirror our 
political choices, or values. Thus the issue or opinion, becomes more than just 
opinion, it ties into, and overflows into a multitude of other areas in which we 
must come to terms with in said discrepancy. After all how does one rectify an 
unpleasant disagreement based on core beliefs, when the union was or thought to 
be based in likemindedness?

It can't. A polarizing difference can become divisive within the friendship. 
This event creates opposition and starts to eliminate the bonding of shared 
experience or preference. Once the unraveling begins, it becomes difficult to 
merely switch topics or find something else to align with. After the initial 
dent, erosion begins and while parties try to rectify their position and 
rational themselves out of the possibility or probability of the disagreement 
being of a petty nature, the damage has been done. Often in relation to very 
passionate beliefs, alienation of affection is instilled, conscious or 
unconscious, and the once touted connection, pervaded, has a shelf life nearing 
expiration.  

How do we unite when we disagree, especially on such alienating issues? I don't 
have an answer. The next paragraph is my best shot at a solution for my theory. 

By no means is it a solution to all conflict. In fact, often it's damn near 
impossible. I'm reminded of a Viktor Frankl quote; 'When we are no longer able 
to change a situation- we are challenged to change ourselves.' It reminds me 
that the only calm place in a hurricane, is the eye or the center. The center is 
always ourselves. What I know for certain is, as a human being, I want to be 
heard, respected, loved, cherished, and celebrated. I think everyone innately 
wants these things. I know I want to remain flexible in mind, so I must learn 
how to see more point of views than my own, and see where I may be exclusive or 
inflexible in my life. I want to continue being flexible in body, so I continue 
to dance and be a yogi. I want to remain being flexible in spirit so I must find 
joy, in both trials and triumphs. And, anytime I am doing anything less than any 
of these things I'm embarrassed to admit, I'm further from my objection than I'd 
like to be. In celebrating differences and seeing the benefit to them, minus the 
hate, is a road to uniting, even in a difficult and divisive time. How do we 
create and nurture diversity without division? I can only change me, so that's 
what I must do. What better time to practice, than the holiday season, on the 
cusp of the 'end of the world' as we knew it. 

Lately I’ve noticed a growing societal trend. Amongst the causes and groups, the kickstarters and the pledges points to a developing theme. The most recent explosional cause and campaign: Kody 2012, led me to drew a very specific conclusion. First though, if you have not watched the already famous video presentation I urge you to do so. Specifically for the opportunity to understand the following context and to possibly expand your experiences in social media.

Following my viewing of the Kony 2012 campaign video; I donated as my friends did and discussed it with them. We shared the link and changed our photos, probably in an unconscious effort to show a shift in perspective and for what we might felt as, the greater good. It made us feel united, vehement to help our fellow man, and proud to do a good thing, the right thing. I wondered much like many other people, why so many of the world’s injustices were hide from our local (united states) media. Were we, as a nation, just misinformed? Did the greater powers of our country just not care? Or was our media no longer a reflection and representation of us? I had a brief flash back, remembering my first exposure to the Occupy movement. Shocked that the media wouldn’t cover it. It became an internet obsession. Everyone was hearing about it online, posting articles and personal experiences on the social networking sites. Soon following the overload of Occupy information, slowly, the media started to cover it. Following the mainstream media the anti movement propaganda developed. Articles and statements, photos and articles in opposition were born, and a war within a war began. 

Shortly after my exposure to the Kony 2012 explosion, I started to notice anti Kony 2012 videos and articles. I was curious. Who would be against such good? I read and listened, and felt a sadness. Again the war within a war had ignited. Even friends on my social media forums were speaking out, not for the children the cause was meant to help, but in opposition of the group collecting and distributing the funding. Allegations of fruad. Accusations about how awful Uganda’s government and military was, aligning in human affairs to Kony and his atrocities. Rumors that certain hateful religious groups had also funded the campaign inferring insidious purposes. For a second I felt jilted and fear that perhaps we had all been had, and that nothing was truly ‘good.’ That feeling was quickly replaced by a greater realization. Below I have shared with you my response to an article posted by a friend, reflecting some of the above claims. I think it outlines my feelings perfectly. 

I tried to read it all, but I just couldn’t. This article nor any you send or post will change my standpoint on this issue. Here’s why, and I’m guessing you want to know, because you tagged me in the post.

Right now in life I’m choosing hope. I’ve given money to the homeless that undoubtingly have bought booze or drugs, I donated to the Red Cross during 9/11 when soon after was discovered the executives of the company made 6 figure salaries that year. Foolishly I even ‘contributed’ to a pyramid scam once. (That one specifically, I learned from) All of these experiences have the same theme in common. Hope. 

Hope that someone with nothing for a second can feel like they have something. Hope in that when something horrible happens to a nation that everyone will contribute in aid. Hope that at any point in time you can take action to improve your life, even if it doesn’t go your way in the end. For me, hope has become a catalyst for motivation. It is not in expectation of an unrealistic or unattainable outcome. It is not in the hunger for the guarantee of my personal beliefs or agenda. 

I like that people dislike what is going on in Africa, because up until recently not many American’s (or other countries) paid much attention (a few celebrities did, but it did not start a movement). I like that people are willing to give, even in an economy that is recovering. I like that young people are interested in being revolutionaries. Most of all regarding the Kony campaign is the idea that a bunch of caring people can demand what we want in our country, government, and the world, through what I see as our ‘new’ media. Our social networking sites. We now decide what news is and isn’t. We are now bringing to attention the ideas and stories that matter to us. I like the idea that this is going on. It’s electric, it feels good and to me, that is hope. 

I am not concerned with who gives money to who, because in our time space money is the means in which much gets done. I wouldn’t negate a hooker donating to a church, or other seemingly ironic situations, so I wouldn’t negate this. I understand the gist of the article - and make no mistake I un waveringly support and desperately want equality for all, specifically, the hopes and dreams of the LBGT community. I also very much like and appreciate the site in which you sent the link from.

The Kony 2012 Campaign lets me continue to focus on the transcendence of the human spirit, this is what I choose to see, and because one defines their reality, it is mine. However, as indulgent my love for likemindedness is, I also can find appreciation in diversity. Your views often differ slightly than my own, however, it is in this contrast that expansion is born, and without an expanding universe everything would cease to be. So, thank you for this link, I appreciate your view point, thank you as well for continuing to bring attention to the Kony 2012 Campaign as even in your suspicion you are still carrying out the underlying cause of the mission - awareness and attention.’  

This is dedicated to anyone who’s ever auditioned in his or her lives. To all the dancers out there right now, who are getting ready for, attending or just got back from an audition. To all the Choreographers who were once dancers, and may or may not, have forgotten what it’s like on the other side of the table. I give you…

 JILLIAN’S TOP 10 AUDITION RANTS

1. No rates. No dates.

This seems like it would be a no- brainer. You don’t have the rates for the job nor do you have the work dates. If you are a choreographer in this situation, calmly put down the agency phones numbers and call up the producer or person in charge of the job.  You need more information. You do not need to hold an audition yet. Not only do you not need to hold an audition, but you should question how you would respond personally, as a choreographer, if you were given no rates or dates. When you neglect to put important information in a break down, not only are you compromising who will show up but also you are doing everyone a disservice, including yourself. For example, if you don’t know dates, you cannot ensure the dancers you would like to hire. If you do not know the rates you are gambling that the rates are worthwhile and fair, when in reality it could end up being ‘copy and credit.’ Do yourself and dancers a favor; get all the information you can upfront so everyone can make an educated decision.

2.‘Just have fun.’

People who say this to you before an audition are either completely removed from what we do for a living, or have not auditioned in a very long time. As much as we would all love to be so positive and optimistic that everything is FUN, lets get real. Auditions are not fun. In fact I can think of many other fun things to do than go to an audition. I don’t think getting up early and pounding on makeup and stabbing myself in the eyes with fake eyelashes is fun. I also don’t think being stressed out and printing out a resume with the last bit of computer ink and then sitting in traffic is fun. I don’t think trolling for parking or feeding meters in between groups of 5 is fun. Call me crazy but I can think of much more fun things to do than stand in a hot stank room with hundreds of other people waiting to get accepted or rejected. The only thing ‘fun’ about auditioning is the rare possibility of a job coming out of it. And of course seeing a couple familiar faces and bonding over the ridiculousness of it all. Honesty is the best policy. Auditioning is a way life for a dancer. It sucks, it’s horrible, and it’s unbearable. Accept it, make friends, and try and do your best given the circumstances. Don’t lie to yourself. That’s just adding insult to injury.

3.‘Treat it like a class.’

I wish I could treat auditions like classes. People say this all the time, like it’s a way to just shrug off the nerves, stress and pressure. For me it doesn’t. Much like ‘just have fun’ this one just isn’t working for me. What class do you take where there is a possible paycheck at the end? What class do you pile on a gallon of makeup and wear your slutty best? What class do you not get to learn anything BUT what will get you kept through the next cut? What class has so many people in it you can’t raise an elbow without seriously injuring someone? You know what saying works for me? You can’t lose something you don’t have. Yup. You can’t be nervous or stressed about something that isn’t yours. And until you book it, it’s not. Even with this outlook, I’m still nervous.

4.‘I’m not available for the job I just came to audition for fun.’

I’ve heard this a couple times. I can’t help but just stare in wonder at this person. The same expression of wonder I would imagine I would have on my face if I saw a pig fly, alien ships descend on the United States, or Sarah Palin winning the Nobel peace prize. Why put yourself through this? The only reason I can come up with is, you’re lying. Lying to yourself AND everyone around you. Besides, not avail for the job? Why waste the choreographer’s time? That’s like seeing a really amazing item on a menu only to be told it’s not in season.  It’s false advertising.

5.‘I’ll keep you on file.’

I don’t know how much I really need to comment on this one. Who actually keeps files? Unless you are casting a HUGE job, employing many dancers, no one is going to refer to their files for this job or the next. They are either going to use who they trust and know, or hold a new audition to ensure availability. But it’s nice they want to keep that little bit of hope alive…

6.‘Audition for upcoming jobs and projects.’

Call me cynical but this line is a very specific code for: ‘I’m making my own reality show pilot and I need to have people look interested in my work and jobs, so I’m going to have a mock audition, but of course I am working so technically at any point in time I could hire you for something, so I’m not really lying and holding a fake audition.’ I don’t know anyone who has ever booked anything from a mysterious ‘upcoming jobs and projects’ audition. Unless someone has had a different experience, I am going to have to call Bullshit. I stay clear of these cryptic auditions. But if you just want to ‘have fun’ or ‘use it like a class’ by all means go for it.

7.Grocery shopping on an empty stomach

This has happened to all of us, so it’s easy to understand why it happens in auditions. Remember a time when you are very hungry, you are so hungry but you have no food in your house.  Reasonably, you make your way to the grocery store. Upon entering you find many things that look good to you, in fact even things normally you would scoff at you find edible and appealing. In particular, lets say you are not particularly fond of canned green beans. On this particular day, you are so hungry and starved that not only do they look appetizing to you; you buy 5 cans of them along with the other many things you find very savory. You return home with your new groceries and feast. Now with a full stomach and a new perspective you look around at the rest of the items you bought and see the green beans. Not only do they not seem appealing to you, they seem downright unappetizing and you question your sanity. You realize you bought the green beans on an empty stomach. The green beans sit in your shelves until they expire or there is a canned food drive. I give you this scenario because I truly think this happens when choreographers or producers don’t know what they’re looking for. At first they are calling all types, and keeping all types. Only until they are given some direction (a full stomach) can they adequately decipher who would be best for this specific job.

8.Thanks for coming so I can waste your time

You woke up early, extra early, even though you worked late last night. You took the side streets instead of the 101 to avoid the traffic, you skipped Starbucks because you were afraid you would run late, you picked out your outfit ahead of time to save time, and you keep your headhshots and resumes in your car to avoid a critical 5 -10 minutes of printing mishaps. You even allow extra time to find a parking spot and be able to sign in before number 175. Except, there is no sign in sheet. In fact there is no one that seems to be in charge and no choreographer in site. You check the time, ask a friend, chitchat, and check your email. Before you know it 15 -20 minutes have passed. You stretch walk around put more quarters in your meter check the time. You finally come to the realization YOU JUST GOT FUCKED. While this audition is very important to you, it doesn’t seem that it’s that important to the person running it, and neither is your time or anyone else’s. This is probably the easiest way to piss everyone off. Being too important for your own audition. Gross.

9.Curtesy keeps

The dance community is one of many relationships and connections. One that pulls together to help each other in times of need and has a 6 degrees of separation that can span the globe. In our community friendships reign and that is often apparent in auditions. This is the part where I rip apart people for only hiring they’re friends. Except, I don’t have a problem with that. I don’t think there is anything wrong with hooking up your friends, in fact, I would do the same exact thing, and so would you. Who doesn’t want to hire friends? Especially the very friends that may have helped you, and can get the job done. My issue is when the courtesy of keeping people is not a courtesy at all. If you have no intention of hiring someone, don’t keep him or her. You may spare their ego in a room full of peers but in the long run, you waste their time and their hopes. Just treat the audition process like a band-aid and rip it off fast as you can- if you must. For dancers, I think most of us agree we want honesty. If you can’t use us, don’t keep us. Unless told specifically we will never know why exactly we are getting cut, and it really doesn’t matter, unless it’s something that can be adjusted. Most of the time it has to do with things we have no control over, so why sit and obsess about it. Personally when I don’t get called I think the job either didn’t happen or if they cut me they made a big mistake. J Adapt this idea and it is better than beating yourself up after the fact or replaying the audition over and over again in the scene of your mind trying to find the factor that was your demise.

10.Bait and switch

It was picture submission. It’s not a cattle call. They are only seeing 10 people from each agency. It’s a small call. It’s an invited call. It’s a private call. It’s going to be in and out. They’re not sending that many people. It’s only your type they are seeing. This rules. When it’s true. Often it is not, as much as we want to believe it is and as much as the agents tried to get us to believe it was. You walk into what you think is going to be a small call only to notice that someone MUST have advertised this on craigslist yesterday. This also goes along with saying the audition is one thing and then it actually being something else. The old bait and switch kick ball change style. This one is just rude. Be honest. Let people decide based on the facts, not what sounds good. No one is angry at the truth, they are only angry when someone gives them mistruths. I’ve learned to always ask questions, through questions you get more information to make a more educated decision, one you can get behind and be confident in.

In loving conclusion, my dearest choreographers please remember you were once (hopefully) dancers. Ditch the egos. Yes you may be holding the audition today, but it is not your opportunity to exercise your pent up issues or anger. You once went through the same trials and tribulations, as you are about to bestow on the dancers you are auditioning. Remember what it was like truly. Don’t abuse, don’t take advantage, and don’t turn it into a circus or reality show. Remember that today you may be a choreographer but in our line of work anyone can be anything on any given day. Be kind, be sweet, and be responsible. 

Dancers, take the bullshit and just laugh. Booking auditions is not a reflection of how great of a dancer you are. Some of the best don’t book, some of the worst do. You are not better than anyone and no one is better than you. Marianne Williamson state’s from ‘A Course In Miracles’ that ‘We are all special, and none of us are special.’ Don’t let auditioning and its outcomes define you. Everything I have said aside: try to be patient during auditions for as long as possible, most choreographers are doing the best they can to get through everyone, give everyone a chance, and be time efficient.

Lastly, there is a phrase you may have heard: ‘sink or swim’ and that is truly what I liken auditioning to. Often it is just that. You either sink or you swim. I’ve come to realize over the last 10 years though, that you don’t need to sink or swim, you just need to keep your head above water. If you can just keep your head above water and tread, you will survive. Good luck, break a leg and see you at the next one. ;)